Today wasn't anything special.
I woke up around 11:30 - later than I expected to, but not altogether late.
I'm back in the suburbs staying with my parents for what I say is the last time but that is not entirely true.
I am in the last (and first) leg of grad school and this will be the last month of my life where I can officially say I have NOTHING going on. So, in a way, this is the last time in my life I will be slumming at my parents house with nothing to do. But it will not be the last time living at my parents house.
June waits ominously as the move-back-in date that has been inevitably approaching ever since I started college four and a half years ago. My job does not start until August 10th, so there is no hope of moving out AT LEAST until then. After that it I am walking the line as to how long I can live at home (difficult for 2 reasons) and how much money I want to save.
At the maximum rent I have budgeted for myself, living at home for a year will save me a whopping $20,000. If the sum was not so high, this would be a non issue.
I don't think I could handle more than a year - I'm not even sure I can handle just the one.
Part of it is the freedom I am giving up - not being able to come and go as I please and the ever present unspoken curfew (how late is too late?). My parents are not unreasonable. They are a dream since how they were when I was in high school. But I am not in high school. I am 22 years old with a very serious boyfriend that I am used to spending a lot of time with. I have a crazy best friend who keeps me young in the same way that Turtle Man keeps me old - one that sometimes likes to keep me out until 5 in the morning. A lifestyle they do not approve of.
Turtle Man himself presents another distinct issue. I don't think I am shocking anyone by saying that a 22 year old has her boyfriend sleep over quite a bit. That would be done with me moving home. And even when he gets his own place, will I have to lie to go over there?
These are all mundanities that I will face when the time comes.
My biggest issue lies thus:
I will have to tell people I'm living in the suburbs.
The thought makes me cringe. Maybe I am a snob, but I've been looking down at my high school compatriots who went to their state schools and have moved back to the suburbs (whether with their parents or not) and gloried in the musk of suburb bars. I have not been to such a bar since I was under 21 (with my Golden Ticket to bar-land) and even then I went ironically. The thought of these bars swarming with not only my graduating class but my younger brother's graduating class? I shudder.
I don't even think much more highly of the ones who have moved into the city. They make a big show of inviting everyone from high school to stay with them and go out and... I know I'm being unreasonable.
In a previous post I mentioned that the scars from high school have not totally faded. What helped me was viewing Chicago as my own special club - one I had a right to. It didn't bother me that people were moving into the city - because I had been there longer.
I just know that if I go back to the suburbs... I won't feel myself.
This is the true reason why the year will be hard.
But I suppose I will have to suck it up....
I will return to this sour subject at a later date I am sure.
#
Anyway, today was fine.
I helped the mother make Christmas cookies - kind of.
And I walked Daisy and let her frolic through the tundra of the reservoir, but she seemed to enjoy it.
I drove Turtle Man and I to the city to go to the Chriskrindlmarket (tourist trap) and the ice rink at Millennium Park (another tourist trap and we didn't even skate. We have rescheduled for Monday). We saw someone proposed to on the ice and that made me smile - I have ever witnessed a proposal IRL before. We went to the Billie Goat Tavern and Turtle Man made fun of me. We hung out at my apartment for a little bit and watched YouTube videos. And then I drove us home.
Nothing special, but I was still happy about the time.
I miss Turtle Man. Which is silly because I just saw him 3 hours ago - but it is the truth. A little over 2 years in and he is still my favorite person and my best friend.
I am very lucky to have him and my forever friends in my life.
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